Starting Our Family

The reality of infertility, IVF and donor eggs

My Colposcopy

on May 24, 2013
 

Originally posted Feb 20, 2013 –
 
 
I was so excited to talk about the 7 Dwarfs yesterday that I totally forgot to talk about my colposcopy, which hopefully doesn’t turn out to be the mean old witch. 

I’ve struggled with HPV over the past 25 plus years so this wasn’t my first colposcopy or biopsy.  I’ve had this procedure done countless times- sometimes leading to a false alarm and other times leading to cryotherapy, coning or a LEEP.  At this point I have a little less than half of my cervix, which when pregnant, will eventually lead to me needing my cervix sewn shut to prevent premature labor or miscarriage.  And you thought the drama ended with IVF.   

Warning- Graphic Description:  A colposcopy is similar to a regular pap smear except they use a microscope type machine and instead of harmlessly swabbing you with a bristled stick they use scissors or some cutting instrument.   First they put the car jack in you (laymen’s term for that duck billed thing to open you up).  Then they clean your cervix with a vinegar solution.  After that they take a peek with their microscope machine.  It reminds me of those big binoculars you see on a bridge or on top of a building to look out at scenery.  They put this long metal tool inside you.  It reminds me of the tool used by mechanics to pick up nuts and bolts they drop in the engine.  It grabs a piece of your cervix, pulls it and then snip- yeah- OUCH!  Most doctors will tell you to cough as they cut but it doesn’t make it hurt any less.  My doctor usually does this in 4 places around my cervix (12 o’clock, 3 o’clock, 6 o’clock and 9 o’clock).  As if that isn’t enough then they take little scratches of tissue.  I don’t know what that tool looks like but from the sound of it I think of when my hairdresser thins out my hair or like Edward Scissorhands carving a shrub into the shape of a swan.   They put all those pieces of you into a jar and send it off to the lab.  And so you don’t bleed a lot or get an infection they put glue stuff on the cuts, which eventually comes out in the form of a snot like discharge.  Good times!

End of graphic warning!

My doctor said my cervix looked pretty healthy and she doesn’t think its anything more than mild dysplasia.  That’s good because I will just need to go for paps every 3-6 months to keep an eye on it.  Anything more than mild they would probably want to steal more of my cervix and I don’t have enough to spare.  Of course she couldn’t let me get away that easy so she took 3 biopsies and some snippings to be tested.  I reminded her that my RE will not let me do a transfer until the results are back.  She said she would mark my file STAT but sometimes that’s like marking a box “fragile” and then UPS goes out of their way to break the contents.  She did say that she felt I could proceed with a transfer based on what she saw and would tell me RE that if need be. 

Fingers crossed my results come back ok.

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